LET IT BE LOVE

When a flower is touched by the rays of the morning sun, it opens up, touched by love; and one says that the opening was done in love because it was opened in the daytime, by the light.

But when a flower opens up in the night, it too might have been opened up by the light, the soft moonlight or the warm embrace of a gentle night wherein lives quietly love too. For some flowers love the day and some flowers bloom at night.

But a brutal Hand, a treacherous laugh, a cruel hungry storm, will not wait for day or night; it will prise open its stolen prize, and pride will pay a heavy Price, for it will be broken. So, let it be love, dear. Because nature wants to take her course, not give her curse.

At the right time
In the right way
In all simplicity and naturalness
Gentleness and in trust

My dear Child, let it be Love.

– Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

OUR BOUNDARIES

You don’t see yourself, because you are yourself and for you that is the normal, natural, only, right and best way and thing to be. You don’t sense or recognise or take cognisance of the thought or perception that you could ‘improve’, ‘change’ or grow into something or someone ‘better’. Your limits are perceived by you as being the limits, borders and boundaries of absolute reality.

The most fundamental first step on the path to self-awareness is the accrual of the recognition that there is a difference between your reality and absolute reality. And between your reality and everybody else’s realities. And between everybody else’s realities and absolute reality.

I have gone too far. ‘Absolute Reality’ is a key term. First you have to realise – i.e. internalise through repeated experiencing – that there is a difference between yours and others’ realities. The next step is considering whether there is an ‘Absolute Reality’ different from and beyond yours and those of others, one within which every consciousness and reality finds resolution, be it in dissolution or in elevation and completion. Third is the recognition that your reality can grow towards Absolute Reality without ever reaching it, for that is the character of the absolute – it forever draws you onwards.

With the recognition that your consciousness is your perception is your reality is changeable comes the realisation that it can also grow away from Absolute Reality, i.e. shrink and become smaller, and its new boundaries become again also the limits of your perception, your consciousness, your reality. We see and live things really according to how we inwardly are. Understanding is a boundary. We say things like “The boundaries of our understanding”, whereas we should probably say instead “The understanding of our boundaries”, or better still: “Our understandings are our boundaries”.

– Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT

Power is, or derives from, an idea into which all concerned subscribe. This idea is the exponent of a recognition to which a people as a collective have come; in other words, a consciousness into which a homogeneous group, a common type, has awakened. This recognition, this consciousness, now becomes a component characteristic of this homogeneous group which as a group has graduated from type to type. The members of the group thus acquire a distinct, distinctive nature that differentiates, distinguishes and distances them from every other group. They thus become a “People”, the rough draft of a nation. And this people, these people, are the children of an idea to which they have subscribed, out of which their world view has been born. And the concept of Power inherent in this idea becomes the foundational notion and nature of Power that determines their politics and their interpersonal relationships.

Because this power is subject to a context into which they all subscribe, rooted in an idea which has become their mother, they are all bound to it and all bow down before it. It thus becomes the socio-political and culturo-spiritual Soul of their national personality.

When this people comes into contact with a different people of different ideology, a culture clash takes place. Communication gaps and mutual misunderstandings become their meeting points. The divergent concepts of power, born over centuries or even millenia out of different recognitions and perceptions, creates a situation where each group has the feeling that the other group is not “playing by the rules”. Whereas perhaps they simply have a different understanding of the concept of “power” and of “power-play”. You only see what you understand; every other  thing remains at best a riddle, if not entirely invisible and impossible to perceive or empathize with in any way. At worst, it is adjudged to be a threat.

This is where the need arises to “learn another person’s language”. The other person’s inner language of concepts. Therein lies the understanding of their concept of Power, and thus of their understanding of what should be the right and balanced form of interpersonal relationships. When two such come to a mutual understanding and meet in the middle, then the product of their new and shared understanding becomes a living guideline and another valuable page in the universal charter of human rights. And responsibilities.

– Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

NATURE OR PROPENSITY

For people who, by nature, are partner-faithful and relationship-loyal (I’m talking Sex here), there exists in their inside a great big Why when they observe how a person who they know really loves his/her partner with all his/her heart can have a sexual interchange with a third party – one time, or for a shorter or longer period, or intermittently – and yet remain totally committed to and in love with their chosen “permanent” partner. Is it a predisposition or a weakness?

It’s like a puzzle, a mystery that defies solution.

– Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

GERMANY: LAND IN THE MIDDLE

There is something about Germany. It seems to be, at the same time, 100% Capitalist and 100% Socialist, poised, balanced at the meeting point between capitalism and communism.

This word “Communism” is not much used anymore, as people prefer the less menacing sounding Socialism, – in fact now they only say “Social”, in order to free themselves from adherence to its stricter definitions – but its principles, its Goals continue to live on, refining itself towards realisation, in the heart of many people and many nation-building ideals.

Now East has become West. But what is in the heart cannot be wiped away with signatures and bulldozers. They say in Africa: you can remove the monkey from the bush, but you cannot remove the bush from the monkey. (As an African, obviously I am allowed to use that proverb without being accused of being politically incorrect 🙂 ).

Everything, i.e. every mindset and striving,  seems to come together, find a balanced confluence, truly, not in America but strangely enough in Germany. The two sides at the same time.

Mayhaps stems herefrom the Anglo-American fear of Germany. This sensing that it was not only West Germany that went into the East, but also East went into the West. East and West have both … well, not vanished, but become ever more indistinguishable from one another, become something new, something called Germany. A new modern experiment.

If a look is cast at political, social, even spiritual tendencies in the world today, and an eye kept open for the one place where the different, often competing, differing ideologies all seem to have struck cohabitual roots, then ever and again Germany takes the Spotlight.

Socialist at heart, capitalistic in endeavour; and their system of thought reflects this marriage, or attempted marriage, of ideals.

– Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

THE WAY OF THE DRAGON

What was strange to others, was ordinary to us. When other kids went for children’s parties, we went for training and competition in martial arts and swimming. That was our father’s way – and it was the only way we knew; and looking back now, God bless that man. He was just unapologetically himself. He gave us a different world in which to live because it was the only world he was convinced of. A world of discipline, simplicity, hardwork, scholarship, modesty, frugality, brotherhood and fraternity. This is the root of our bond today – my siblings and I.

The most horrible thing that can happen to any person, to any family, to any society, is to think that there is something wrong in being different. For, then, there will neither be change nor progress. Just be yourself, even if it is different – nay, especially if it is different. Earth thrives on diversity. And diversity is only guaranteed when each person has the courage to be himself/herself. Thus, courage is the protector of our future as a human species. People, BE BRAVE.

Our father wanted to strengthen bravery in us, so he threw us into the martial arts, where you are alone in the ring and only your own fearlessness will see you through – and, win or lose, will cement your character and your legend. Just fight fearlessly. That was his message: Let fearlessness be your blood; that is all I ask of you. Win or lose, please my child just fight to the end.

When we turned it against him, though, it caught him unawares. Maybe he unconsciously hoped everybody was burning to be a public servant, or a socialist, and things like that, like himself. But I just wanted to be myself, to answer the call of life in another context – and he had taught me the courage to do so. But myself, at least in that period, was everything different from what he wanted for and from me. The irony and riddle of doing what is expected of you and thereby going against what is expected of you. The split was unpreventable, unavoidable and – for many decades it seemed – unhealable.

But Time, that great Mender, was Merciful. And Love pushed its stubborn head through and I will forever be grateful for the three beautiful years we had until he died.

Well, what on earth is this life all about? Who really knows? Is it politics? – Not everyone can be a politician. Is it the professions? – Not everyone can pursue one. Is it family? – Not everyone will make one. Is it ideology? – Not everyone will feel inclined to one. So what on earth is this earthlife all about?

In the end, it is simply whatever is in you that has to come out of you. And all you need to do, to make that happen, is simply to BE BRAVE. Brave enough to follow your innermost voice, no matter what!

– Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

THAT SAME OLD GOAL

Parallel worlds. The Radio is whispering coming war – cultural, civil, religious, racial. It’s in people’s eyes, there’s no love for strangers anymore, and suddenly they are everywhere.

Revenge. It’s time to correct history. Power. It’s time to attain victory. And it fills you with despair because humankind never learns. They wait a few Generations, build or buy more lethal weapons, radicalise themselves and their children some more. And then they try again.

Weapons of mis-communication; weapons of mass-Propaganda; weapons of mis-education; weapons of asocialization; weapons of radicalisation; weapons of mass-destruction. Weapons of war.

And if they fail again, they’ll think it’s because their weapons, or their tactics, were not lethal enough. They’ll never question their motives or their hatred. They’ll wait another couple of Generations, and build or buy even more lethal weapons, and perfect their tactics and strategies some more. And then try again. And again.

Until Humanity destroys itself. Completely.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

SEX IS NOT THE ONLY FORM OF INTIMATE CONVERSATION

Sex is not the only form of conversation, connection, exchange and sharing, in the course of Intimacy between people. There are other options that may fulfil the need for temporary or permanent oneness more effectively than sexual intercourse, depending on the chemistry between, the story around and the needs of and nature within the people involved.

1. THE NATURE OF CONVERSATIONS
The nature of verbal conversations between people can sometimes be a more powerful form of intimacy than sex, giving room for an inner release of pressures that not even sex can achieve. This often happens between people who feel comfortable enough with each other, or find the courage, to share information about their vulnerabilities with one another, and have found a language in which to do so. Some friendships bear this Quality intrinsically within.

2. SHARED SILENCE
There are some people whose most intimate exchange happens in deeply felt moments of shared Silence. This silence is like a continuum in which their thoughts and intuitive perceptions merge and shape one another. The people involved always emerge from such moments with enriched souls. These are people who of one another often say: we like to be silent together. Silence is their bond.

3. HONEST QUARRELS
A good quarrel – extreme, hard, honest, totally baring – is sometimes the best form of conversation and the most intimate way to exchange the most revealing information between two people or a set of people. I became acquainted with some of my closest friends after a quarrel. I met my wife through a quarrel. It was the quarrel that paved the way for the love. Quarrels are often missed opportunities when the people involved, while quarrelling, are – for lack of trust – not honest with themselves and with the other person. And yet sometimes the fundamental or temporary chemistry between two people is such that only an honest and brave painful quarrel will fulfil the function of the intimate conversation they need in order to take their understanding of one another to the next level.

4. HOMELINESS AND HOME
There are some people with whom we share the most open exchanges and most intimate conversations because the context of our chemistry and the base of our bond is a certain sense of home or homeliness, the type in which the real us feels ‘at home’ when together with these people. Some share this connection from birth, some acquire this in the course of a relationship or a friendship that makes them feel at home with each other. And this sense of home does not require of them to do or say anything extra or particular, or require another form of intimacy. The sense of being at home while together is in itself already their intimate conversation.

5. DISTANCE
There is a curious intimacy in distance that sometimes comes into play between certain people. It is delicate and fine, but also very intense, very strong and very revelatory. Invasion without invasiveness. Penetration without intrusion. An all-encompassing knowing, full of the most sensitive respect. The power of distance as a mediator and form of intimacy is often underrated. And yet there are some people with whom we can only enjoy a feeling and a sense of an intimate conversation when we find and keep the right distance between ourselves. Sometimes such people know us more intimately than the ones closest to us and may sometimes enjoy our rarest trust. It is also not by chance that people sometimes reveal themselves to and connect with less restriction and more satisfaction with Strangers than with those they know – exactly because of the fact that they are, and will remain,… strangers.

6. SEX AS A DEPTH OF COMMUNICATION
Voluntary sex is different things to different people – a power-game, a playful act; or for some it’s deeper, a level of release. There are people however who, apart from or in addition to this, experience sex as a form of conversation. An intimate way of sharing self-knowledge and exchanging sensitive wordless information about what we are in the primitive depths of our fundamental personalities. Just as sex can be used to tell lies, project a falsehood and hide secrets, it can also be used – by people whose bond trigger that chemistry – to communicate. People who experience sex solely in this way have a satisfying sense of communication, or frustrating non-communication, in connection with every moment of sexual intimacy.

7. A SHARED GOAL
There may be truth to the saying that there is nothing that binds people together as primordially and intuitively as a deeply-felt and shared Goal. The stronger and deeper the love and loyalty they have for the cause, the more this condition possesses the ability to break all barriers between them and link inner parts of their hidden selves with one another on levels which are never activated in their dealings with other people. That is to say: when people love the same thing and work passionately towards the same purpose, it wavelengths them into a place where only they can go together. The entire context of their relationship with each other becomes determined by that for which they share their truest love and most quiet loyalty, to which they have pledged the very essence their life, and it becomes the underlining hearth of their bond, their quiet intimate conversation.

The individual natures of each person and the chemistry between people, as well as the nature of intimacy possible, mutually desired or needed between them, is what determines the form of interchange between them which permits the realisation of this intimacy.

– Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

MUHAMMAD ALI

ali
“I know where I’m going and I know the truth, and I don’t have to be what you want me to be. I’m free to be what I want.” – Muhammad Ali.

As a boy, those were the men in my life – my father, and Muhammad Ali. My father and I both loved Ali. And now they are both gone. One year after the other.
So much is gone with Ali.
One of the earliest Poems I wrote in my life, in 1988 at the age of 14, was in honour of the one they called The Greatest – Muhammad Ali.
I have to check my old papers when I get back home today. I hope I find it, and I’ll post it on my blog. ( I did 🙂 )
Good things are forever.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

TREACHERY

Was I not perhaps there with them, beneath the bombs and amidst the bullets and amongst the kids that died too easily, too early, and never rose again? Was I not perhaps there with them amidst the hoping and the despairing and the neighbours that turned too easily, too quickly, too happily, into foes – was I not really there? Aye, was I not perhaps there too, I wonder, was I not? I sometimes seem to see again the metalbirds dropping parcels of eager death and ripping the way open for birth, the painful birth of a new generation unafraid of guns, bombs and nuclear threats, and wary only of the little lies that neighbours and friends are ever wont to tell.

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– Che Chidi Chukwumerije.

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