Of Alienation

BECOMING CIRCUMSPECT

~ Che ~ Leave a comment

A year passed by so quickly, like a whirlwind. The most important lesson I have learned: Value people who tell you the truth, for they are rare. Be sparing with your trust. And know that, unfortunately or fortunately, there is always something more to every story you hear. The exceptions to this rule are rare. So, become circumspect, even as you love harder. Because the harder you love, the deeper you go into the heart of truth and deception. The human heart is on earth to grow, and it grows only by intense and authentic experiencing of itself and of other hearts. So, open your heart to everything, but know this: “Everything” includes both the light and the dark, both the dependable and the treacherous, coming both from strangers as well as, even more so, from the people you trust.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains

PARALLEL UNIVERSES

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When a person just doesn’t know how to tell you the truth, they simply stick to the lie. From start to finish. Even if they want to tell you the truth, they don’t know how to, they don’t know where to start because the truth runs on a completely different storyline and separate lifestyle, opposite reality and parallel universe. It will hurt you deeply and completely overturn your view of life and of them. Or so the person thinks. But if only they would try you, to see a new person emerge and a new powerful authentic relationship form.

Starting with a lie is always a slippery slope, a rollercoaster ride. It is nervousness and heart palpitations from start to finish. It can be exciting and exhilarating, until it becomes human and personal. Then it becomes a chore, a nightmare, a heavy load, and a puzzling sphinx, a difficult riddle to solve. Tell the truth and shatter the other person’s reality? Or maintain the lie and allow it to eat you inside and gnaw at the other person’s gut instincts, and prevent both of you from ever forming a true bond? And yet, only the truth liberates.

There will be a humanity one day of honest human spirits who live, share and relate in the light of truth always and in all things. Deeply and simply. Inside and out. Individually and as a society. The most fundamental truth we owe ourselves as human beings is the truth of how we really are as a person. This is the basis of all relationships and of society and of a possibility to one day have a reflection of Paradise on Earth. A home away from Home.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains

DEFLATION

~ Che ~ Leave a comment 
It‘s a strange feeling when you stop caring;
You look for it inside you, it’s no longer there.
The heart grows cold and stops sharing,
And lies overtake the spirit of truth or dare.
It’s a strange feeling when you stop fearing
To lose what you love the most to have near.

What has freed you leaves you feeling empty;
The answers are few, the questions are plenty;
But the urge to know has suddenly died recently. -

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

SPOTLIGHT

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Some people are full of lies. Once you see through them, they start running. Because their only true super power is their ability to lie and to cover up their lies. Once you have or develop the kryptonite to this power, they run away from you.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains

AFTERMATH

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It took me a while to acknowledge and accept the betrayal. And the permanent change. It is what it is. But now that I have, I have. Now, we can successfully pretend, together and apart, that it never happened; and that we were never that close. Now the bond is broken. The intimate bond of trust.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains

INTERACTIONS AND INTERRELATIONSHIPS  

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Envy and Jealousy and Possessiveness. Distrust and Disloyalty and the breaking of Promises. Not knowing one’s boundaries. Untoward and unjustified claims upon the other. Intrusiveness. Space and vicinity. Balance. Knowing the line between giving and taking, between being there and crossing boundaries, between being close enough and being too close for comfort. Knowing which demands and expectations are legitimate and must be met, and which ones are too intrusive. Respect. Mutual respect. Consideration for the other’s nature. Making the effort to know the other better. Carefulness. Intimacy. Understanding the different layers and forms of intimacy, and knowing which ones to share with which people, which ones apply within which forms of friendship, which ones are exclusive and which ones are inclusive. You can connect with many people deeply, and each connection is different. But there is a certain connection that can only be shared with one, or none, at every point in time. Truthfulness and honesty and trust and bravery. Trust is a form of bravery. Reciprocity in our relationships with one another.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains

STOP ACCEPTING LIES

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Stop accepting lies
Dressed up as niceness –
Humiliation lies
In falsehood, not kindness.
Empty conversations
Masking your blindness –
A Disappointed Soul
Will answer with silence.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

YOU DON’T BELONG

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You can only close your eyes for so long,
Your inner voice knows when something is wrong;
However hard you try to feel among,
You won’t be accepted where you don’t belong.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

MOVING THROUGH WORLDS

~ Che ~ Leave a comment 
Moving through worlds
Like a thought moving through minds -
Changing and being changed
By everything and everyone one finds.

Worlds as different as different can be,
Minds as far apart as distance can be,
Hearts as strange as strangers can be,
And yet in all these places you still can be.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

ACCEPTING THAT

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Accepting that you are not the one
for the one you love and want the most
is the most hurtful pain to sleep upon
Night after night hugging a ghost.

Accepting rejection without rejecting acceptance
of and by yourself and those who love and value you
is a difficult and uphill task, a complicated dance,
but also a chance for you to liberate and revalue you.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river