You think it matters Until it happens And then you realise It doesn’t really matter You think it kills Until it happens And then you realise It only hurts for a while And then it disappears. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
Of challenges
PRE-DAWN
The light is gone from my heart And gone from my life And cut out my most sensitive part With a dark burning knife But I don’t care, because underneath The heavy mountain of pain A greater flame bursts from its sheath And lights up my heart again. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
SUDDEN JOLTS
I cry spontaneous tears
They come unbidden
Rolling back adult years
All of a sudden
The wounds, the tears
A shuddering bolt
And a painful spasm
Of old fears and new cares
That repeatedly scars
Anew my heart with a volt
Of shivering behind cold
Iron intangible bars
A body-wracking jolt
And then the next moment
I quietly laugh again
Grateful and content
To reap my fruits in pain
I don’t know when
The tears will come again
At 2 o’clock or at 10
In a meeting, at a game, or on a plane
Or taking a walk in the friend zone
Or sitting at home all alone.
Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river
REAFFIRMING DIGNITY
When a woman leaves a man who loves her to follow a man of money, it is the most crushing pain a man can feel. But if he does not let it kill him, it will only liberate him in the end. Every once in a while you have a chance to look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself “I am somebody”. Something will push you there. Something that seems aimed at robbing you of your dignity, your pride, your self-respect. Something that will try to tie your actual value as a human being to some material status or achievement or level of acceptance by someone or some people. Something that will make you feel small. And nothing does this deeper than love that chooses money over you. Then you have to stand in front of the mirror and look into the soul of that man staring back at you and recognise his true value. Remind yourself of the principles at the core of your foundations as a Human Being. Remind yourself of what connects you to God and to true life. And teach yourself again that your value is more than your monetary wealth or material standing. And don’t allow anyone to tell you otherwise – not any man and not any woman. Because, In Your Dignity, You Are Somebody.
Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains
DON’T GET LOST IN THE DARK
Don’t get lost in the dark Wait for the mist to clear The emotions never speak the truth They are always informed and biased by feelings You just have to wait for the mist to clear It takes a shorter or longer time to pass Depending on your nature And depending on the circumstances Just don’t get lost in the dark. Azuka Chukwumerije
LOVE AND PAIN
Why is there so much hurt in this world? Why is it hard for people to join hearts without causing each other pain? Why is pain an unavoidable component of love and of togetherness? Is the human spirit really incapable of honest, pure, harmonious, mature love?
The people that love you are the people you will hurt, and they are the people that will hurt you the deepest and the most. And yet you cannot stop loving and you cannot stop loving them. Nor they you.
Who has ever found happiness on earth without it being laced with anguish and spiked with periodic doses of lacerating pain? If you haven’t found this, then you’ve never felt love yet. Because you can never find the love without the pain.
Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains
SWAN SONG
Always remember one thing If it’s true love it can’t move on overnight It has to close its ring Heal its wound, acquire new insight And make the heart a swan-song sing. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
EACH ONE HEAL ONE
We all have that one person who we don’t like to think of, but who we also never forget. That one person, the thought of whom causes us so much pain and anger. That one person who hurt us, or deceived us, or betrayed us, or belittled us and made us feel so small, or took advantage of us, or kicked us when we were down and weak, or made a fool of us, or stole what was precious from us, or led us astray, or lied against us, or harmed us.Maybe it was that one person who we trusted deeply and who betrayed this trust. That one person who left a permanent scar in our heart. We all have that one person who we don’t like to think about but who we also never forget.
And that person also has the one person who they don’t like to think about but who they also never forget. And so it goes round and round in a circle, and we are all locked and connected in a net of pain and disappointment and bitterness and betrayal and memory and hurt. And regret. No one is spared, no one is innocent, no one is free of pain or of guilt. We are the ones who teach each other the lessons of life and of the vagaries of the human heart. We are all we have. Those that hurt you and those that harm you and those that heal you and those that hug you and those that have you are all the same people. Everybody has touched somebody. And everybody has been touched by somebody. Each one hurt one. Each one heal one. Forgive, and move on.
Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains
YEAR OF ACHING
What a difference a year can make Depending on the path you take The pillars you shake The bonds you break The demons or the angels you wake And the thirsts you slake. For whose or for what’s sake? For something real or for something fake? Some say the heart is a lake Beneath its surface there swims a snake Your happiness is at stake And yet all you seem to do is ache and ache. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
FIGHT FOR IT
You have to fight to be free - True freedom, inner freedom - Fight your fears and anxiety, The chains of your inner fiefdom; Fight your propensity and proclivity For weakening pleasure ; Fight your despondency And fight your insecurity With courageous Hope in equal measure. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
Che Chidi Chukwumerije 