Did you know that Smiling makes you happy When you’re feeling crappy? Did you know that? I bet you’re smiling now. And if you were feeling crappy, Now you’re feeling a little happy - I bet you’re smiling now. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
Of Dark Feelings
THE DAY THE LAUGHTER CAME AGAIN
The day the laughter came again I stood in shock and stared at it in awe Like a stranger from a distant terrain For I had forgotten to a tragic flaw How laughter sounds and makes you feel. It felt so good it made me want to cry; The power of laughter and joy is real - A heart that laughs purely will never die. The day the laughter came again I was at the lowest ebb of my life, My soul wracked every day by pain, Torn by questions and unresolved strife, I woke up that morning and prayed to God, then set out to bravely meet the day And as I, work-focused, did onward plod, Laughter came to me again along my way. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
UNTIL IT HAPPENS
You think it matters Until it happens And then you realise It doesn’t really matter You think it kills Until it happens And then you realise It only hurts for a while And then it disappears. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
PRE-DAWN
The light is gone from my heart And gone from my life And cut out my most sensitive part With a dark burning knife But I don’t care, because underneath The heavy mountain of pain A greater flame bursts from its sheath And lights up my heart again. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
WOMAN’S HEART
Women are usually emotionally far ahead of men. For brief moments, the men might overtake, but in the overall story, usually a woman’s heart knows more than a man’s heart, knows it earlier than the man’s heart, remembers more than the man’s heart does, and retains the memory for much much longer than a man’s heart ever could.
Without woman’s heart we would lose our memory of home and our understanding of homeliness. When a woman goes, the home goes. And when a woman comes, Home comes back. The heart of woman alone can dig a tunnel to hell or span Heimdall’s bridge to Heaven. And she does it quietly, right there beside you, where the half of them poison you and kill your spirit’s joy, and the other half of them heal you and make you deeply happy. With just a few words, and sometimes even without saying a word.
Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains
SUDDEN JOLTS
I cry spontaneous tears
They come unbidden
Rolling back adult years
All of a sudden
The wounds, the tears
A shuddering bolt
And a painful spasm
Of old fears and new cares
That repeatedly scars
Anew my heart with a volt
Of shivering behind cold
Iron intangible bars
A body-wracking jolt
And then the next moment
I quietly laugh again
Grateful and content
To reap my fruits in pain
I don’t know when
The tears will come again
At 2 o’clock or at 10
In a meeting, at a game, or on a plane
Or taking a walk in the friend zone
Or sitting at home all alone.
Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river
REAFFIRMING DIGNITY
When a woman leaves a man who loves her to follow a man of money, it is the most crushing pain a man can feel. But if he does not let it kill him, it will only liberate him in the end. Every once in a while you have a chance to look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself “I am somebody”. Something will push you there. Something that seems aimed at robbing you of your dignity, your pride, your self-respect. Something that will try to tie your actual value as a human being to some material status or achievement or level of acceptance by someone or some people. Something that will make you feel small. And nothing does this deeper than love that chooses money over you. Then you have to stand in front of the mirror and look into the soul of that man staring back at you and recognise his true value. Remind yourself of the principles at the core of your foundations as a Human Being. Remind yourself of what connects you to God and to true life. And teach yourself again that your value is more than your monetary wealth or material standing. And don’t allow anyone to tell you otherwise – not any man and not any woman. Because, In Your Dignity, You Are Somebody.
Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains
DON’T GET LOST IN THE DARK
Don’t get lost in the dark Wait for the mist to clear The emotions never speak the truth They are always informed and biased by feelings You just have to wait for the mist to clear It takes a shorter or longer time to pass Depending on your nature And depending on the circumstances Just don’t get lost in the dark. Azuka Chukwumerije
LOVE AND PAIN
Why is there so much hurt in this world? Why is it hard for people to join hearts without causing each other pain? Why is pain an unavoidable component of love and of togetherness? Is the human spirit really incapable of honest, pure, harmonious, mature love?
The people that love you are the people you will hurt, and they are the people that will hurt you the deepest and the most. And yet you cannot stop loving and you cannot stop loving them. Nor they you.
Who has ever found happiness on earth without it being laced with anguish and spiked with periodic doses of lacerating pain? If you haven’t found this, then you’ve never felt love yet. Because you can never find the love without the pain.
Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Undulating Plains
ORIENTATION
Don’t get used to the exhilaration, It is a bubble that will soon burst To be followed by the long deprivation And the unbroken thirst. Get used to the soberness instead, It will stay for longer than you hope And will be your daily bread With which you have to daily cope. I try not to yearn for the happiness, But the heart is treacherous; Unbidden it feels a new tenderness - This happens to all of us. And there are some pains you prepare for - They will always come, come back to you, For once upon a time it was you who tore It out of your heart and gave it a job to do. Che Chidi Chukwumerije Poems from the inner river
Che Chidi Chukwumerije 