UNTIL IT HAPPENS

You think it matters
Until it happens
And then you realise
It doesn’t really matter

You think it kills
Until it happens
And then you realise
It only hurts for a while
And then it disappears.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

PRE-DAWN

The light is gone from my heart
And gone from my life
And cut out my most sensitive part
With a dark burning knife

But I don’t care, because underneath
The heavy mountain of pain
A greater flame bursts from its sheath
And lights up my heart again.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

SUDDEN JOLTS

I cry spontaneous tears
They come unbidden
Rolling back adult years
All of a sudden
The wounds, the tears
A shuddering bolt
And a painful spasm
Of old fears and new cares
That repeatedly scars
Anew my heart with a volt
Of shivering behind cold
Iron intangible bars
A body-wracking jolt
And then the next moment
I quietly laugh again
Grateful and content
To reap my fruits in pain
I don’t know when
The tears will come again
At 2 o’clock or at 10
In a meeting, at a game, or on a plane
Or taking a walk in the friend zone
Or sitting at home all alone.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

THE HEART WANTS TO UNEARTH IT

When you ask me Why I make all this rhyme
The answer is
What else should I be doing with my time
But exactly this
Nothing else is worth it
The pain covers the bliss
The heart yearns to unearth it
What you will one day miss
Your aching heart wants to birth it
Every day
Every blessed day
Every single day.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

DON’T GET LOST IN THE DARK

Don’t get lost in the dark
Wait for the mist to clear
The emotions never speak the truth
They are always informed and biased by feelings
You just have to wait for the mist to clear
It takes a shorter or longer time to pass
Depending on your nature
And depending on the circumstances
Just don’t get lost in the dark.

Azuka Chukwumerije

SWAN SONG

Always remember one thing
If it’s true love it can’t move on overnight
It has to close its ring
Heal its wound, acquire new insight
And make the heart a swan-song sing.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

WITHOUT YOU

The people you expect to be there
Are farthest away when you need them near
The beautiful world is barren and bare
Without you. I need you here
To share with me my hope and fear
And marvel at the sunsets rare
And be my sunrise and midnight clear.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

ORIENTATION

Don’t get used to the exhilaration,
It is a bubble that will soon burst
To be followed by the long deprivation
And the unbroken thirst.

Get used to the soberness instead,
It will stay for longer than you hope
And will be your daily bread
With which you have to daily cope.

I try not to yearn for the happiness,
But the heart is treacherous;
Unbidden it feels a new tenderness -
This happens to all of us.

And there are some pains you prepare for -
They will always come, come back to you,
For once upon a time it was you who tore
It out of your heart and gave it a job to do.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

NEVER

Liars will always lie -
That is their truth.
Winners will always try -
Without expecting ruth.
Lovers will always laugh and cry -
That’s the secret of their youth.
A giver is a river that’ll never run dry.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river

YEAR OF ACHING

What a difference a year can make
Depending on the path you take
The pillars you shake
The bonds you break
The demons or the angels you wake
And the thirsts you slake.

For whose or for what’s sake?
For something real or for something fake?
Some say the heart is a lake
Beneath its surface there swims a snake
Your happiness is at stake
And yet all you seem to do is ache and ache.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
Poems from the inner river