Why was I born? Why were you born?
Into this Earth.

My birthday always makes me think. This year more than ever, I don‘t know why. The questioning thought: Everything I‘ve done in the last 48yrs, have they in any way really fulfilled the reason WHY I WAS BORN? Or have I up until now, in a deep subtle way, just been wasting my time? For I was not born in order to celebrate that birth annually. Viewed logically, that‘s a senseless feedback loop – unless augmented, nay, superseded, by a PURPOSE – and the fulfilment of that purpose – of my birth into this earth.

49 years ago, I was not here. I was not a part of this daily hustle and bustle, getting into cars and busses, voting in elections, raising kids, being earthy and doing the earthly. So, where was I? And why did I come here? Where were you before you were born? And why did you come here?

Every year the certainty that I‘m closer to my earthly death, to my departure. I just feel it, so strongly. That reduced distance. It‘s not just a piece of general knowledge that we all have: Everybody dies one day. Yes we all know this. But it is more than this. It‘s also a solid emotional perception, a physical presence that comes closer, that you can feel when you close your eyes and pay attention.

My birthday makes me think, not just of birth, but also of death.

My brother, Kwame, aged 19, died on my 21st birthday. It was a few weeks before his own 20th birthday. The person closest to me. Why did he come? Did he or did he not fulfil the purpose of it? And then he was gone again. It‘s a date we share, in life and death.

Life existed before we were born into it. It was perfect, already. Before we were created, Creation was already formed and perfect. This realisation makes me think and there is no end to this reflection. Just a clear line of perception – an intuitive perception:

You are not without a reason and not without a purpose, unless you fail – consciously or unconsciously – to discover that reason and that purpose; and then to – deliberately or instinctively – fulfil that reason and that purpose.

It‘s a serious and thought-provoking business meeting your birthday again, and still not knowing why. Or knowing if you’re fulfilling why, as best as you can. Year after year.

I don‘t need to celebrate my birthday. I need to reflect upon it.

Reflect before celebrate.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije
06. April 2022

Little Che – mid 1970s.


I wish there were two of me – and both would go out in the morning on different paths of experiencing and fulfillment, to cover all I have to cover. And in the evening they would come back again and unite in one person, myself, not doubly rich in experiencing, but just fully rich.

I sometimes wish the two sides of me could divide and live two different lives, and then unite again at the end. The linear experiencing of time and limited experiencing of space are the best spur to make the most of every moment, every second, every thought, every intuition. Because one person one life… is just not enough.

Our vanity projects end up eating up most of our time. Superficiality. Once is not enough, even twice is not enough. The many lives we should give to our Striving, we sell to our Vanity for nothing. And then you are here, trapped in one experience, and wishing you could divide yourself into three or more; and send out your volition, cloaked multiple times as you, to go and attend to all the other fires which, deep within your heart, you know are still burning in other aspects of your life.

Who is ever finished at the end when he or she has to go? Hardly anybody. Precious Moment, open up and link me always to the underground stream of my true destiny. Whatever I seek and whatever I do, may I the spirit be truly finished and fulfilled by the time I‘m done and gone.

– Che Chidi Chukwumerije


He was a messenger from far away
This thought that I secretly caught
And wonderful tidings he brought my way
Of all the secret things I still ought
Nay, must, do, must do
To you, my dear, to you.

But this he whispered first of all
That I must meet another stranger first
And secretly yield to his inner call
He lives in me, my root intuition’s thirst
For my secret powers become free
Only after I first become me.

– Che Chidi Chukwumerije.


Everybody cannot be rich and everybody cannot be the boss, and yet everybody can be happy. Everybody cannot be the acclaimed best in their chosen fields of activity, yet everybody can be happy and can know that sense of fulfilment that only joy can bring.

So the question is: What is it, deeper than wealth, health, status, acclaim, power, that can make a human being happy and, through the bequething of joy, give them fulfilment? How does one approach life so as to attain to the highest prize – joy and fulfilment – irrespective of the outcome of one’s most ardent striving and efforts?

Where does ‘Pride’ factor into all this? Must one subdue and swallow one’s pride, or even become uncompetitive, in order to be happy with every outcome? Or can one channel one’s pride to a higher cause, a nobler idea, a deeper clarity?

At what point do all human beings become one, working together towards the same goal, despite all forms of competition? Can this be generic, i.e. applicable in all things? What happens then to the ‘Joy of Victory’?

As the world and the individuals hurtle on at blindening speed towards the pinnacles of Anger, I-am-better-than-you-ism and Hatred, driven each person and each group by the urge to be FIRST, it is important to consider if there is not another measure of success more fulfilling and, most importantly, more sustainable than this winner-takes-it-all competiton model of domination-desire.

Because through the continual establishment of a level playing field in the scientific education sector from generation to generation, a point in time will arrive in the future where too many people and peoples will have the knowledge and the ability to wreak wide-spread havoc on the earth. And then the I-First and I-Only mentality will unleash a terrible War within and upon Mankind, on all levels, that will bring our species to the brink of destruction, if not take us over it.

The meaures of Success and Fulfilment have to be redefined. Success, the chalice of deep inner personal joy, is the development of one’s inherent abilities and virtues to full bloom. Fulfilmemt then follows  in the united pooling of abilities towards an ennoblement of humanity. Victory in this undertaking alone will bring us eternal Joy. In this endeavour one can and should be inspired by others, yes. Also through the healthy ethical competition between people an impetus to innovate and grow is intensified. But a proper context of a shared common human goal will alone make us grasp this: that victory of virtue is victory for all.

Because, as child-like and laughable such concepts as Altruism, Humility, Egalitarianism, Cooperation and Impartiality sound to the entitlement-poisoned modern mind, the truth is that only these concepts and their kind will spare mankind certain self-destruction in the future. And in self-destruction, none shall remain to savour any joy of victory.

Che Chidi Chukwumerije.